Praying with Stipulations

So I have been trying to decide if I should buy a town home and there have been some issues in the process that made me want to back out. It happened pretty fast and I was feeling a little anxious about it and wondering if I should go through with it. I fasted and went to the temple to pray about it. Mostly I was worried that it wouldn't be a good financial investment and that I would be safe there. I wanted Heavenly Father to tell me to back out if I was going to lose money on this deal in the end.

I wanted it to be easy, painless and without any problems. Looking back I wonder how many of my prayers come with stipulations. I remember once praying for humility and the thought flashed into my mind, "You're going to get in a car accident." I quickly clarified my prayer, "but just don't put me through a car accident. Anything to humble me but that." I believe it was within a week, I totaled my car.

While I was in the temple I was reading about Joseph Smith and the questions he prayed about. Then I thought about how much opposition he went through. I wondered what would have happened if he prayed, "Help me to know the truth, as long as it isn't hard, painful, stressful, humiliating, emotionally draining, or heart wrenching. Just help me and my family be comfortable, financially secure and full of joy all the time.

My sister was telling me about a christian radio station she was listening to many years ago and a guy calling in said, "We have to understand that if we pray for something like patience, faith or humility, we are going to have to pick up the other end of that stick. If we pray for patience we are probably going to have an experience that tests our patience. If we pray for greater faith we will likely have an experience that tries our faith. If we pray for humility, we will likely have a humbling experience."

I guess that is a part of faith. We have to say, help me gain these characteristics, or help me grow and not have it be based on feeling swell all the time. We just can't limit the Lord's blessings with our stipulations.

This isn't to say that painful experiences are always necessary for growth. The Lord has told us that any trials we endure shall be for our good (D&C 122) but I know that he doesn't needlessly throw a wrench in our lives for fun. We can always seek the Lord's blessings through obedience to his commandments.

This isn't to also say that we shouldn't pray about big decisions, but perhaps in our prayers we should be focused on spiritual growth and other blessings without limiting what the Lord is able to do with us based on our stipulations.

I know with the town home I owned previously it didn't turn out to be the best financial investment but it brought people into my life that were probably more important than an expanding bank account.