Jeepers Creepers

I just finished reading Elizabeth Smart's book.  It took me 3 days.  I seriously had a hard time putting it down, so much heartache, so much drama, so much derangement. She started out by sharing a story from her Sunday school class where her teacher told her that, “If you pray to do what God wants you to do, He will change your life.” She took that to heart and locked herself in her bathroom then closed her closet door and prayed for that exact thing.   This all happened a few days before she was taken.  It is so crazy to think about all the influence for good she has had in the world since this whole experience, given the prayer she prayed. 

Thankfully she does not give all the graphic details of her experience, but she does give you a horrifying view of the level of incomprehensible derangement she was dealing with.  She cleared up a lot of things that the media, guessed wrong and lays to rest forever the rumor that she suffered from Stockholm’s, or ever shared any affinity for her captors.  She just wanted to stay alive and protect her family while living under constant fear and threat.  I didn’t know that Mitchell was on the hunt for 7 wives and all had to be young and Mormon.  I am so glad that he is locked up, but I think this book may have made me a little paranoid. 

I was walking in the park yesterday, alone, which I didn’t think much of because it was between 6-7pm and there was plenty of light and plenty of people around.  As I was walking around the softball fields, I passed this tall guy, probably three times my size, red and white hair, that wore these safety sunglasses, which I have probably seen blind people wear.  He smiled and said hi as we passed but I got the creeps a little bit.  Then I thought to myself, be nice, he could have a visual impairment.  Then I thought well at least I won’t have to pass him again since I just have 1/3 of the way around the fields and head home.  Well he was much bigger and walked much faster than I did.  As I left the path, he started to follow me and despite walking twice as fast as I did around the track, he maintained his distance behind me.

I tried to keep my eye on him, without making it too obvious.  I passed a miniature pincher, off leash with his owner just texting away on his cell phone.  The dog didn’t pay any attention to me but when the guy passed the dog he started to freak out and bark like crazy.  The guy tried to do the whole good puppy routine but the dog just got more wound up and the owner finally had to put down his phone and get the dog to stop.  Maybe the dog sensed my fears, haha! 

I was about to leave the park and I thought, I do not want this guy to follow me home.  There was a family out at one of the picnic tables and they had others playing volleyball across the path.  I thought maybe I should pretend I know these guys and wait for him to pass but I just didn’t know what I would say to them.  “Uhhh… can you tell me what time it is even though I am wearing a watch?” Finally I pulled out my cell, called my sister and sat down at a nearby picnic table.  He passed, and I waited until he was a good distance down the road before I started to follow him.  He picked up his pace and was out of sight pretty quick.  I was never really worried anything would happen, but no one likes getting creeped out, especially when they are reading books about crazy people.

On the bright side of all of this, reading about all that Elizabeth went through (without the graphic details) I am amazed at how well she is doing.  It just seems to tell me that if Elizabeth can overcome what she went through, what is to stop anyone from getting over life’s traumas?  In the end it has all made her more compassionate, understanding, resolute, determined, helpful and faithful than ever before. 

As for her healing she said it has been a lot of things, but she said that she never met with a professional counselor, and stresses that every survivor must create their own path to recovery.  She said that many things have helped her like playing her harp, having gratitude, being with horses, faith, family, love from her community, thinking of her pioneer ancestry and the things that they went though.  She said, “All of these things helped me, but ultimately, to get better I simply made a choice. Life is a journey for us all.  We all face trials. We have ups and downs.  All of us are human. But we are also the masters of our fate. We are the ones who decide how we are going to react to life. Yes I could have decided to allow myself to be handicapped by what happened to me. But I decided early on that I only had one life and I wasn’t going to waste it.”

Pursuit of Happiness

I read the book.  I don’t recommend it.  I liked the movie much better.  The book details a lot of very hard to read experiences of the author that were part of his drive to happiness (his definition included being a good father, making lots of money, being with lots of different women, getting revenge, and giving back to his community) like I said, some parts were very hard to stomach and I almost stopped reading the book a few times.  I suppose regardless of what I did or did not want to learn about the author’s life, goals and dreams, happiness is often born out of very painful experiences that help us search for answers and a better life for ourselves and others.

I have been thinking long and hard about this piece I watched on CBS Sunday Morning  It was about a woman named Elaine Stritch who was 89 years old and at the end of the interview she said she was going to spend the rest of her life trying to figure out what real happiness was.  She had been a very successful Broadway actress, winning a Tony and three Emmys.  She was married and had a family and yet through all of this, she was unable to say that her life has been happy. 

I am sure there are a lot of factors that played into her unhappiness.  For one, she came across to me very crass and shocking and she had many serious bouts with alcoholism. She has spent her life acting because she would rather be someone else then herself.  It left me feeling empty and depressed.  It made me wonder if she had any idea that she was a daughter of God.  I can’t say she acted like she knew it, so my guess is that she didn’t.  I wish I could have told her, I suppose all I can do is pray that someone or something will tell her.

So where should I go for answers on happiness?  Lemme see, maybe the scriptures?

After washing the Apostle’s feet, the Lord says in St John 13:12-17...

“So after he had washed their feet, and had taken his garments, and was set down again, he said unto them, Know ye what I have done to you?  Ye call me master and Lord: and ye say well; for so I am.  If I then, your Lord and Master, have washed your feet; ye also ought to wash one another’s feet.  For I have given you an example, that ye should do as I have done to you. Verily, verily, I say unto you, the servant is not greater than his lord; neither he that is sent greater then he that sent him.  If ye know these things, happy are ye if ye do them”

In St John 16:33, it says…

“These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace.  In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.”

Basically most of the scriptures pointed to repentance, keeping the commandments, serving others and putting our faith in the Lord. Interesting how none of them say that having money, or a successful career will make us really happy yet that is what the world and the media keep trying to convince us of. All of this is obviously easier said than it is put in practice, but it is always a good thing to be reminded of.  I think we all need the reminder at certain times in our lives. I know that I do.

Ta-Da!

My title makes it seem like I feel like a champion but as I have just finished with my 2^nd back splash I feel like it has almost defeated me.  See this is what I say now, but the truth is I am going to forget about what a pain this all was and I am going to try and take on another project, well at least I know there will be no new projects for a while.  At least none that I want to take on alone.  I am just going to have to enjoy the fruits of my labors.  At first I wasn’t so sure I liked the finished product but it is growing on me.  Perhaps in a month or two I will really like it, right now I mostly like the fact that it is done.

In all both sides of my kitchen cost me about $180 to complete.  Honestly I think I went to the Home Depot at least 10 times, to get supplies and get tiles cut.  If I had a professional do it, I think they said it would have been $15 per square foot.  I think I had about 15 square feet so that would have been $225 that I saved myself.  Good work me!